bliss-sad's Diaryland Diary



The days are so long.

FIL is still living with us. My brother, unsurprisingly, has been the single worst person we could've chosen to complete the work that needed to be done to the new property. We finally got the bulk of the project completed, now we just need to clean up, furnish and find health care.

Devon had to fire the last caregiver; it needed to be done--we needed someone we could trust to actually take care of FIL, but now he's without any help.

When FIL first got here in August 2021, I asked Devon to call around to his various insurances and find out what level of care he qualifies for. That still hasn't been done, and being that I'm neither a beneficiary or next of kin or related to this motherfucker in any way HIPPA cares about, it's been impossible for me to get it done. I'm looking at power of attorney stuff, but if I'm being honest, I am struggling with the idea of the increased responsibility.

Work has been incredibly stressful lately; I picked the wrong time to join the supply chain. Moral is low, people keep leaving.... Sometimes I wonder if I made the right choice, but I'm committed. At least that's what I say as I bring in plants and hang pictures (something I have been notorious for never doing at any previous job). Last week I called in Monday, took a half day Tuesday and worked remote on Wednesday.... I'm burning out already. It's a "good job", it's pretty close to home, it's not entry level....all of those things are great! It's just....also a total shit show. It's also the wild west. Our system doesn't deplete items from inventory and our ERP system is only, like, halfway set up.... It's too boring and infuriating to talk about, honestly.

So work is stressful, being at home is miserable and stressful.... It's like, there's no place that's safe and comfortable and cozy and okay. The best parts of my day are the 15 minute drive home from work and the 25 minutes of quiet before bed.

I don't think I'll ever allow anyone to spend more than, like, 2 nights at my home ever again.

10:39 a.m. - 06.22.22


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